First, you have to become more aware of how your mind works. We live in a society that has more or less programmed us – and continues to do so – to look for the negative, to expect the worst. (See TV news, the written press, the fake news universe…how much of their focus is on positive events? 1%?) Our parents and our educational systems try to protect us by warning us, from a very early age, of all the dangers we are likely to face. Given this tilted mind set, we quickly start to label our own personal experiences as disappointments and failings thus amassing more fears and feelings of inadequacy…that slowly shape our personality and confirm a bleak view of the world. Perhaps the original intention was good. The result, sadly, means that we become accustomed to mainly see the negative in ourselves, in others, in most situations and ultimately in the world. This view is comfortably projected and reinforced by the films, shows and works of art we create and consume. As with every vicious circle, our society becomes a reflection of our negative thoughts about society.
The positive, the beautiful and miraculous appear scarce and alien to us. We don’t really trust them. Yes, we are, at times, able to feel positive, see beauty in the world and acknowledge wonderful, unexpected occurrences. But we are “realists”. We “know” such moments are fleeting. And when the time comes to educate our children we pass on the message we have received – and come to believe- ourselves: the world is a dangerous place. Expect suffering and disappointment.
How often were you told, as a child, that life is miraculous…that there is always something new, beautiful and wondrous to explore? That you live in an intelligent, caring universe? That you, as a human being, are a miracle? That you cannot fail? That for every apparent failure or mistake you make you are constantly contributing your uniqueness and richness to life? That Life loves you and needs you…exactly as you are?
It doesn’t really matter. You can start right now. You can choose a new path.
Instead of seeing life as a rather perilous journey, you can decide – choose – to see it as the most amazing opportunity. All those things that are out of your control…they are not threats…they are wonderful surprises.
Instead of feeling like you always have to prove your worth – imagine that your only real duty is to be – You. No questions asked…no expectations – just enjoy. Embrace Life. Trust Life…and let this positive, confident and trusting attitude guide you.
Can you? Can you choose to enjoy life, to enjoy being you?
It will mean leaving that burden – everything you believed in, everything you took for granted – behind, and start afresh.
This, now, is your real choice. The other option – to continue to believe everything you were told about the world – is not a real choice. It’s simply taking the line of least resistance. That is the setting we’ve all started with. Your real choice is to decide whether to keep it – and be miserable – or change it, break free and try something new.